As I'm sure many people know, I'm a die-hard Philadelphia Flyers fan, and with that comes an ingrained hatred of the the Flyers' cross-state rivals, the Pittsburgh Penguins. As far as Flyers fans are concerned, Penguin public enemy number one is their crappy mustache growing leader, Sidney Crosby. He has always been pretty easy to hate. He has scored countless big goals in his career, including this one in the 2010 Olympics in which he tore out the collective hearts of every person in the United States and stomped on them with his Reeboks. But lately, there have been many examples of Sid being a good guy, like this one from yesterday's all-star game, and frankly, I don't like it. Me realizing Sidney Crosby is a nice guy is not unlike hearing that Hannibal Lecter volunteers at the local animal shelter on weekends when he's not eating census takers. Sure he's a cold blooded (Flyer) killer, but damn it, it if he isn't a quality human being who s...

I like to walk my dog. Does that make me a better person than you?  Maybe.  It gets me off my dumb ass and my 6-year old German Shepherd, Roxy, really enjoys it. However, on the latest installment in our series of romps through the neighborhood, we, more specifically, I, encountered a bit of a conundrum.  My biggest concern when walking the pup is that she'll have to either take a dump or a leak along the way. I hate the idea of allowing my dog to just do her thing in some stranger's yard and having them come outside in the middle of things, because then I'm stuck trying to talk Roxy and I out of this jam (because God forbid she speak up for once). But on this occasion, the member of our canine-human walking team who had the full bladder issue wasn't Roxy; it was me. I take my dog on essentially the same circuit each time, with some slight variations from time to time. In fact, we've done it enough that she knows the route. As we reached the point of our...

Without a doubt Tom Brady is one of the best, if not the greatest, quarterbacks in the history of the NFL. He's the archetype for successful superstar athlete: he's got the rings, the houses, the jaw-dropingly beautiful Brazilian wife. But still, Tom Brady creeps me out. Tom Brady reminds of any movie where aliens are masquerading around the Earth in human costumes. I expect at any second, his chest could pop open revealing the little alien who is piloting his Tom Brady suit. The nickname "TB12" even sounds like what you'd call a robot. A few months ago there was that video of Brady kissing his way too old son on the lips. That was creepy but I also believe that most straight, male Patriots fans would do unspeakable things for the opportunity to plant a smooch on ol' Tom. I've noticed lately we're getting this newer "I'm a badass" Tom Brady and I'm not a fan of it. He's already one of the greatest players to ever toss ...

I'm going to say it upfront: There's nothing "problematic" about fajitas. I'm just tired of all the "Is (Insert Movie/Game/Book/Anything Enjoyable Here) Problematic?" articles, but they seem to get the Internet machine a-rumblin', so here we are. Fajitas aren't racist or transphobic or ageist or whatever your favorite -ist or -phobic word is, but I do take umbrage with some of the things that fajitas literally bring to the table. I don't like that in a restaurant there is no way to discreetly order fajitas. All other foods make their way to the table in a solemn and dignified manner. Not fajitas. They opt for the "look at me" approach, emerging from the kitchen steaming and loudly sizzling so that everyone at that particular Chili's knows that fajitas are in the building. I think I've even seen fajitas served with a side of Sparklers before. I want to order some food, I don't want to order everyone in the restaur...

GIANT Food Stores is taking a step toward the future and introducing robots to all of their 172 stores.  This robot fella's name is Marty. That seems non-threatening enough, but I've talked before about how I don't think we should be rushing into the world of "robottery" without taking some precautions. Marty's intended purpose is to warn of dangerous conditions within the store. A smashed gallon of milk here, a spilled bottle of vegetable oil there, but that's how the robots will get a proverbial foot in the door; by making us think that they're here to serve us. I don't mean to get into Craig territory , but a robot takeover is a long-con perpetrated by those beeping and booping, artificially-intelligent, power hungry monsters. They ease us into sense of comfort and security, and then just like that, we've got Marty running over an old woman in the produce section. Maybe I'm over reacting a little bit, but when you're forced...

Oklahoma's Heisman-winning quarterback and Oakland A's prospect, Kyler Murray has to decide if he wants to go play baseball or declare himself eligible for the NFL Draft. via GIPHY I know there's never a sure thing in the world of sports and their are so many stories of guys being flops or losing all their money. But how many of them were highly sought-after two sport athletes? Wow, update mid-blog: As I'm typing this, he declared his intent to enter the NFL Draft. Why not? Force the A's to buy you into baseball. What an amazing situation to be in where you have entire sports trying to buy you. At the end of my illustrious hockey career, I had the sport of hockey actively trying to pawn me off on it's red-headed step-brother, lacrosse. Either way, congrats to him.

Wal-Mart is essentially modern-day America's wild-west, especially after 9 P.M. and on Black Friday. In fact, if you go to YouTube and search "Wal-Mart" you'll be presented with a list of things that range from the bizarre to the barbaric.  Yet apparently the line is drawn at a woman driving an electric shopping cart while sipping wine from  a Pringles can. The mistake this woman made was the Pringles can. Any alcoholic will tell you that the key to catching a buzz in public is to put your booze in something nondescript: a coke bottle, a solid-colored water bottle, even a sunscreen bottle . Pringles cans aren't meant to hold liquids, so your giving yourself away immediately. Was this lady an innovator of sorts? Yes, but innovators have to fail before they succeed. Do you know how many different things Edison tried before he developed a working light bulb? Probably a lot. This probably wasn't even the most debaucherous thing going on at Wal-Mart at ...

  (FOX NEWS) -  A Canadian man originally given 15 years in prison for drug smuggling was sentenced to death in China on Monday after a one-day retrial, the surprising verdict coming amid growing tensions between Beijing and Ottawa after the arrest of a top Chinese tech executive last month. (Full Article )  Wow. China pulls off the unthinkable: Pissing off the Canadians. And it didn't even involve beating their team in the Stanley Cup Finals! The Native of The Great White North in question is 36-year-old Robert Lloyd Schellenberg. According to him, he was allegedly duped into carrying methamphetamines into China by a man he thought was a translator. We've all accidentally tried to bring a bottle of shampoo or sunscreen through TSA only to find out that it's a quarter ounce too large to take on the plane. You throw it out, and happily make your way to the bar at the terminal Chili's. If you have meth in your bag the situation is probably a little different. S...

Who didn't see this one coming? A Utah-teenager was involved in a car crash while trying to drive blindfolded.   The driver was inspired by Netflix's Bird Box, the world's okayest horror movie. I watched it, it's fine. It's by no means bad, but it's no Citizen Kane . If you're going to risk your life trying to emulate something from a movie, why not try to emulate a classic? I thought I'd pitch some ideas and see if we can get one of these bad boys to go viral: The Silence of the Lambs Challenge This one is similar to the Bird Box Challenge in that it involves obscured vision. You and a friend find a cluttered basement (try an abandoned house. If authorities try to stop you, tell them it's for the Silence of the Lambs Challenge, they'll be cool with it). One friend hides in the basement while wearing a pair of military-grade night-vision goggles. This friend should breathe heavily to make it more movie accurate. The person without the...

Hollywood Award Season.  The glitz, glamour, and the self-congratulatory back-patting. It all kicks off Sunday night with the Golden Globes, and who better to give you a preview of the nominees and give their selections than myself; a man who hasn't actually seen any of the nominees. Let's dig in, shall we? We'll start with the small screen. Television Best Television Series - Drama The Americans (FX) Bodyguard (Netflix) Homecoming (Amazon) Killing Eve (BBC America) Pose (FX) We starting off on a tough one for me. I'm not exactly one to seek out dramas and generally if people tell me that I need to watch a show (looking at you  Game of Thrones ) I won't end up watching it. I haven't even heard of  Bodyguard, Killing Eve,  or  Pose  which really narrows down my options here. I saw a lot of commercials for  Homecoming  while I was watching other things on Amazon that weren't  Homecoming,  which annoyed me and cam...