The Thermostat Miser

A while back I talked about the trials an tribulations of living with randomly selected roommates. I'm preparing to move out of this apartment that I've been in for the last three years, and just as the finish line is in sight, there's a new war being waged and this time it's over the thermostat.

He who controls the thermostat controls everything. I make sure to assert my alpha dominance nice, cool, and Rob Gronkowski-approved 69 degrees. The perfect indoor temperature.

The reason for that is if your cold, put on a goddamn sweatshirt or get under a blanket. It's much easier to warm up than it is to cool off. Plus, I live in Florida, so if you're cold go sit outside.

I have an uncanny ability to recognize slight temperature differences inside. If I was one of the Avengers, it would be my super power. Sure, it's not a great one, but neither is being good at archery.

*cough* Hawkeye *cough*

When I feel the temperature rise ever so slightly my Spidey-Sense starts tingling. Basically what I'm saying is that I am Snow Miser, undeniably the best of the two miser brothers.

Considering how many movies Marvel puts out, it's only a matter of time before my movie, Ambient Temperature Man, takes theaters by storm.


Popular posts from this blog

Sex-Toy "Scandal" Sparks "Outrage": And Other Words I Like To Put In Quotes

I Spent My Weekend Figuring Out Why Jack The Ripper Stopped Killing; How'd you Spend Yours?

Smile Dammit!: An Update of Sorts To The Sex-Toy "Scandal"