G-g-ghost B-b-blog: Why Aren't There Any New Ghosts?


Ever since I was a young kid I've loved watching ghost documentaries. I find them fascinating and always held out hope that someday we'd be able to scrounge up some proof as to whether or not there is life after death.

However, thanks to a recent revelation, I've finally accepted the fact that the whole ghost thing isn't real.

It all comes down to one simple question: Why aren't there any new ghosts?

Every ghost documentary I've ever seen follows the same formula. There's an old building (almost always a hotel or bed & breakfast for some reason) in which some Civil War soldier clomps through the hallways with his ghost boots.

But therein lies the problem; It's almost always a Civil War soldier or anyone else who happened to live in the 1860s or within 80 years or so in either direction. 

In addition to Civil War specters, you also hear about Revolutionary War soldier ghosts, Turn-Of-The-Century Prospector ghosts, woman who is sad because her fiance died ghosts, and eccentric Roaring Twenties socialite ghosts just to name a few.

There aren't many ghosts from before the Revolutionary War, but the damning evidence is that I've never heard of a ghost who croaked later than the 1940s.

There aren't any greaser ghosts, hippie ghosts, big collar-wearing 70s ghosts, or cocaine-loving 80s ghosts.

I have no clue why that is, but if ghosts were real, shouldn't we be seeing them too? 

The thing about ghosts is they're always easy to place into their respective time periods. You'd know you saw a 90s ghost if it floated past you in a flannel shirt while humming "Even Flow" in a ghoulish way. No one has ever seen that because it's not a thing, but it should be.

People die all the time, but there hasn't been a new ghost in nearly eighty years. It may be a little odd at first to see ghosts floating around with Air Jordans or haunting buildings that were constructed this century, but if we're to believe in this whole ghost situation they should be as plentiful as oil baron ghosts and guy who murdered his entire family with an axe ghosts,

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